


Oblivious

by vitaemins



Series: Oblivious [1]
Category: VIXX
Genre: Fluff and Smut, Friends With Benefits, Light Angst, M/M, Porn with Feelings, Self-Esteem Issues, anyway, but they don't know that about each other, cause if you read it uwu, does that really count though?, ken is a dork with self esteem issues, ravi loves him uwu
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-28
Updated: 2019-05-28
Packaged: 2020-03-20 17:16:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18997042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vitaemins/pseuds/vitaemins
Summary: And it was true. Jaehwan was ready for Wonshik. He promised to fully trust Wonshik with everything and, god damnit, he did. He trusted Wonshik with his life, and that was way before they agreed to this arrangement, but he felt it deep in his heart.They were friends with benefits; nothing more, nothing less. And he should shouldn't feel the way he does. He shouldn't like Wonshik as intensely as he does. He shouldn't raise his hopes up so high. If this goes sour, he shouldn't blame Wonshik for anything. That's why they're doing this.But he does. He does like Wonshik as more than a friend. He does like Wonshik for more than what was the beginning of a sex-only friendship. Everything he felt for Wonshik was so intense. And, when it hits him that he's breaking every single friends with benefits rule in the book, he freaks out. It's a full body chill from the top of his head to the tips of his toes.He tries to act oblivious to his own feelings, but it doesn't work too well.





	Oblivious

Jaehwan tried to be oblivious as possible.

When Wonshik knocks on the black wooden door of Jaehwan’s rundown apartment, brandishing half a pack of cigarettes and a full bottle of scotch, Jaehwan thinks nothing of it.. He invites Wonshik in with a light grin, getting a box of whatever he could find in the cabinet to heat up so Wonshik can eat. Wonshik smiles, accepting the plate of what was most likely ramen, graciously and eats up--Jaehwan smiles at him.

He takes note of the time: 8:08 pm. Wonshik’s here earlier than yesterday. It surprises Jaehwan.

Once he’s done, Wonshik takes a seat on Jaehwan’s small couch and Jaehwan tries not to notice the twitch in Wonshik’s overly eager fingers. He’s been that way since the moment they met: overly anxious, full of energy, always needing to move. He was always on guard which, in a way, Jaehwan guessed he could relate to. They both have spent their whole entire lives working without stopping, working without stopping, working without stopping--

Stop. It wasn’t time for this.

Wonshik looks at Jaehwan from his seat on the couch, looking at him sitting in front of of a poorly built IKEA table--wobbling and unbalanced. He looks at the clock. 8:30 pm. He would’ve gotten to Jaehwan’s apartment right around now, would’ve been far too plastered to even remember his own name, but this time was something special.

“You alright?” Wonshik asks, and he gets up to meet Jaehwan in the kitchen area.

“Totally fine, why?” Jaehwan replies, sipping from a red plastic cup. He's totally not fine looking into Wonshik’s warm eyes, the slight sparkle that doesn't seem to dull no matter where they end up.

“You look out of it. If you don't want to do what we planned to later-”

“No, no--that'll still happen. I’m fine-” Wonshik give him this incredulous look all for the right reasons but Jaehwan was far too headstrong. “Really, Shik.” Jaehwan gets up from his chair with a slight _scoot_ of plastic against wooden floors. He takes a seat on the couch, a single cushion separating him from Wonshik and his hands that never stop fidgeting. Wonshik moves his body to the cushion beside Jaehwan, almost caging him in to the left side of the couch. He’s staring at him. “I'm fine, I promise.” The _I'm in love with you_ goes unsaid, for obvious reasons.

It feels like Wonshik is burning holes into his chest with his gaze.

No matter how long it’s been, Jaehwan could never normalize all of Wonshik’s attention being on him. Jaehwan could never normalize the fact that Wonshik is interested in him; even if it is the beginning of a friends with benefits type deal, the fact that Wonshik didn't even hesitate to ask him was--in a weird way--somewhat reassuring.

Maybe there was some mutual, undisclosed feelings there. Who knows?

“Jaehwan, don't go through with something just because you think it'll make me happy,” Wonshik says casually, grabbing the hand closest to his own. “We don't have to-”

“I promised you something, Kim Wonshik,” Jaehwan was beginning to get snappy and, if Wonshik’s gaze was anything to go by, unintentionally nasty. He softens his tone a bit. “I'm serious, I promised you and you came all the way here and--” Jaehwan looks down towards his feet. There's a blush creeping onto his face. “I'm ready--for you.”

And it was true. Jaehwan was ready for Wonshik. He promised to fully trust Wonshik with everything and, god damnit, he did. He trusted Wonshik with his life, and that was way before they agreed to this arrangement, but he felt it deep in his heart.

They were friends with benefits; nothing more, nothing less. And he should shouldn't feel the way he does. He shouldn't like Wonshik as intensely as he does. He shouldn't raise his hopes up so high. If this goes sour, he shouldn't blame Wonshik for anything. That's why they're doing this.

But he does. He does like Wonshik as more than a friend. He does like Wonshik for more than what was the beginning of a sex-only friendship. Everything he felt for Wonshik was so intense. And, when it hits him that he's breaking every single friends with benefits rule in the book, he freaks out. It's a full body chill from the top of his head to the tips of his toes.

He tries to act oblivious to his own feelings, but it doesn't work too well.

He realizes that it wasn't the first time he's gotten himself into situations like this, falling for one of your best friends, but it was different with Wonshik. Everything is too intense with Wonshik. The feelings he has are most likely not reciprocated by Wonshik.

And that's happened before too, people not liking him back, in fact there are more people he's had feelings for than he has fingers to count on. But if that happens with Wonshik, Jaehwan would feel the worst heartbreak in his life. So, he keeps it quiet.

Naturally so.

“Hey Jaehwan,” Wonshik whispers and his thumb is rubbing circles into the top of Jaehwan’s hand. It makes them both much more calm. “I need to tell you something. It'll kinda kill me if I don't say this and we do this and-”

“Shik,” Jaehwan sighs, leaning into him, “the only thing worse than not telling someone how you feel is dying, so just tell me.” _What a hypocrite_ , his mind screams at him. “Tell me everything you feel comfortable with.”

“The only reason why I did this was because,” Wonshik inhales sharply. “I like you. Maybe more than a friend should, but I like you. And I want to get as close to you as possible, but I don't even know if you feel the same as me-”

What just happened?


End file.
